When life gives you lemons...

...shove them down your bra and make your breasts look bigger. (So says artist Melia Dawn)


But in my case, I was making the good ol' fashioned lemonade. Alas, mine had no sugar.

Since Sunday, I've consumed the juice of 16 lemons in a brutal attempt at detoxifying. Although the 'lemon and cayenne pepper detox program' is supposed to go on for a minimum of 8 days, today I've happily downgraded to simply including a lot of lemonade in my clean eating diet, while severely restricting the amount and type of food I consume. I found after one day of no real food I was depressed, unable to concentrate and experiencing flu-like symptoms. But boy - was I clean.

It was interesting that I didn't lust after junk food; after 16 hrs of fasting, I would have done nearly anything for a serving of pan-seared salmon on brown rice with a side of broccoli.

Apparently, the symptoms are my body's attempt to rid itself of the sugar-craving parasites and candida (yeast) that live in us all, as well as the toxins (environmental, chemical and natural - think: pollution, artificial sweeteners and caffeine) that I have un/knowingly ingested and have accumulated in my body. A friend of mine once told me that before a dirty pan becomes clean, it actually appears to get dirtier as you scrub at the grease and fried bits with soap and water. It's a nice little analogy for what's happening in my body.


So, for the next 8 days, I will:

• Eliminate, or severely limit my sugar intake, including sucrose, fructose (fruit sugar), syrup, brown sugar, honey and artificial sweeteners - basically anything sweet-tasting. Wah!
  
• Eliminate pop, alcohol, coffee, fermented beverages, milk and cheese products and processed foods from my diet.
  

I will eat 6 times a day at 2-hr intervals (8am - 6pm) and include:

• Copious amounts of water, lemon juice and detox tea (8 glasses minimum)
  
• Yogurt, lots and lots of plain yogurt on everything
  
• Raw nuts and seeds (bought a pound of almonds) and essential fatty acids (flax, and fish oil)
• Eggs, chicken, turkey and cooked fish (no raw fish or shellfish)
• And, of course, all the veggies I can handle.

I'm looking forward to seeing the benefits of my disciplined diet. This will include:

• Clearer skin, disappearance of the dark circles under my eyes
  
• Better quality sleep
• More energy, better digestion and an increased metabolism
  
• Greater mental alertness and memory-retention
  
• Increased immunity against colds and flu viruses

This morning, I awoke excitedly at 4am to the cravings of oatmeal porridge with Golgi berries topped with plain yogurt. I had to hold off, but when that steaming hot bowl of porridge hit my empty stomach at 8 o'clock, I swear it was the best-tasting dish I've have ever consumed.

Here's to good health!